There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize