I want to make a zoo with you.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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