Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Randomize
