Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
