I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
try to milk me bitch
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