He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
