Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
