drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize