stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Cover your peen. We're going out.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
