My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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