I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
