I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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