she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize