do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
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