apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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