You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
