it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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