She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
