Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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