I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
