I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
