How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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