We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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