just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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