it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
