"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Randomize