so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
