youre lurking in front of me
now i know why i became what i already was.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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