You're so nebulous sometimes
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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