What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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