So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
