She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
