No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
