oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
