Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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