Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
