He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
