Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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