don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
