Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'm really busy with my period
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