She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Plan B is the new Plan A
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
