; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
