I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
