I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize