Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
im six kinds of drunk right now
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
