so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize