Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize