road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
