You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Still dying that you shit outside
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
