he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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