omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Blood and glitter go together right?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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